Being an Understanding Partner Won’t Make Someone Love You More

[fewrough]

Valentine’s Day can be a tough reminder for some of us...especially those who have spent time being the "understanding" boyfriend or girlfriend, hoping our patience, love, and generosity would eventually be returned. But the truth is, being a giver in a one-sided relationship doesn’t magically inspire someone to reciprocate. If someone isn’t naturally inclined to care for you the way you care for them, no amount of love, sacrifice, or waiting will change that.

This isn’t to say we should stop being loving or romantic. If you’re a deep lover, if you have a heart that longs to give, don’t let bad experiences harden you. But also, don’t let them fool you into thinking that settling for crumbs is noble or that suffering in the name of love will somehow make you "worthy."

And please,never let loneliness, a dry spell, or the fear of being single push you into a situation where you’re undervalued. No one has ever actually died from being alone, but plenty of people have lost themselves in relationships where they weren’t cherished.

If you’re still searching for your person, hold onto hope,but not at the cost of your self-respect. They’re out there, or maybe they’re not. Either way, you’ll be okay. Life isn't only about romantic relationships.

 

[bigroom3]

Dr Orion Taraban sums it up in this video:

Be flexible (wanting to give/change) and also ready to let go if you are not being accommodated.

 

[NancyOgt]

Valentine’s Day can be a tough reminder for some of us...especially those who have spent time being the "understanding" boyfriend or girlfriend, hoping our patience, love, and generosity would eventually be returned. But the truth is, being a giver in a one-sided relationship doesn’t magically inspire someone to reciprocate. If someone isn’t naturally inclined to care for you the way you care for them, no amount of love, sacrifice, or waiting will change that.

This isn’t to say we should stop being loving or romantic. If you’re a deep lover, if you have a heart that longs to give, don’t let bad experiences harden you. But also, don’t let them fool you into thinking that settling for crumbs is noble or that suffering in the name of love will somehow make you "worthy."

And please,never let loneliness, a dry spell, or the fear of being single push you into a situation where you’re undervalued. No one has ever actually died from being alone, but plenty of people have lost themselves in relationships where they weren’t cherished.

If you’re still searching for your person, hold onto hope,but not at the cost of your self-respect. They’re out there, or maybe they’re not. Either way, you’ll be okay. Life isn't only about romantic relationships.

Yes never lose your values, not for anyone and not for anything.